A great big post of many thoughts

What is my dream? What do I want to do with my life?
Well firstly, lets not call it MY life, because really, in the big picture, how much control do I actually have over it? Pretty much none. I am a part of the body of Christ, made in the image of God just like Jesus was too and placed on the earth to do just what Jesus did. Feed the hungry, love the lonely, clothe the poor, touch the untouchable etc. I want my time on earth to be remembered not in a way of fame or anything like that, but I want the  people that I interact with to see that ‘this all surpassing power is from Christ and not from me’ – I want to reflect the King not me. After all it is His Kingdom! 
I have a dream, and that dream is to love people with a completely open heart. I don’t want to judge people on what they’re going through or what they’ve done or what they look like or where they live because I’ve been at the receiving end of that and that sucks; I just want to tell them how much Jesus loves them. Because love has the power to change the world as we know it.
I have this picture in my head of a house. Now this is no ordinary house. No, this is a house that is open to anyone that needs to know how loved they are. A house that always has the door open, that is a fun place to be and where people just embrace each other and all that we are created to be. I want people who are completely broken to come to this house and feel refreshed. To feel renewed and valued and really find who they are, and when they leave they aren’t leaving empty handed, they’re leaving with knowledge; knowledge that they are amazing, that they can change the world.
I see this vision of the house filled with children; children that have been be lost, abandoned, forgotten about and unloved. I want them to be able to grow up in the house in an environment where they are constantly reminded of how amazing they are, how intricately they were created, how important their hearts are and how we don’t need to feel hurt and broken.
I find that I am most effective through my creativity, that I communicate best what God is trying use me for or to get me to say through being creative. Creativity for me doesn’t just mean paint and mess it means freedom. It means joy. It means hope. It means love. In the house I see walls with inspiring scripture and quotes printed in cool fonts and crazy typography all over the walls. I see a giant chalk board wall where kids and anyone else that walks through those doors can feel like they can write down and share anything. I see the BIGGEST dinning room table with endless amounts of chairs to show that no one will ever be forgotten or left out and that anyone is welcome to join. This house isn’t a business or organisation with a team or staff. It’s a family. It’s a place to learn and grow together. My hearts desire is for my own family, my husband and kids (if I get married and have kids that is!) to all welcome people in with arms wide open, to hug them, to love them and to get stuck in together. To me that’s what family is. It’s not your standard 2 parents 2 kids situation (well yes technically it is) but it’s more like community I guess is how to describe it! In a community there is always places to learn, to grow, to explore, to discover; and what better way to do that than as one great family community.
I was really inspired by Mama Hill, an American lady who is in her late 80’s I believe and who says she has about 3,000 children; they just don’t all live with her at the same time! She is a retired school teacher in LA who showers people with love, respect and hugs. If you go to shake her hand when you greet her, you will hear the phrase “I take hugs” from Mama Hill. What she does is creates a safe haven for the kids in her community, where they can come into her home, they can eat, they can play, they can learn and they can be loved. What an incredible woman! Now that is my idea of a fulfilled life!
I don’t really know where to go with this vision because it all seems very big and overwhelming and I keep saying to my self that I need to sweep it under the carpet and get a degree and job etc. first, but hang on… who said you need a degree or six figure pay check to be able to love people!? The Bible tells us that the greatest commandment is to love God with all your heart, mind and soul and the second greatest commandment is to love your neighbour as yourself. So basically that’s what I’m aiming to do. I am seeking God daily, I am exploring His Word and taking time to just listen to Him, but I’m not doing that by keeping myself locked up inside, contained by church walls and restrained by order and tradition. I’m doing that by seeing what church without walls really looks like. By stepping out and living a little radically, by crying out my own songs of prayer and staying up until crazy hours in the morning writing really long posts about my dreams and visions and just generally being excited by the things God has for my life.
Oh and just another side note to that, I have watched a lot of Soulpancake videos today (if you haven’t seen them, check them out on YouTube, they are so inspiring). But yea anyway, they have been doing a whole series of videos about the lives of some great people who are unfortunately living with terminal illnesses. What inspires me by them is that they aren’t videos of despair and fear, but rather the opposite! They show hope, courage, dreams, faith, love etc. If you heard these peoples stories without being told that they were going to die soon then you would be saying that these people are completely at the opposite end of the scale to death, they are doing life how life was made to be lived!

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